


Just Another Morning

by RedLace



Category: Twosetviolin
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:41:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28137858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedLace/pseuds/RedLace
Summary: Eddy is musing over his feelings towards Brett on yet another morning.
Relationships: Eddy Chen/Brett Yang
Comments: 4
Kudos: 25





	Just Another Morning

**Author's Note:**

> Constructive criticism is always welcomed. Also, keep in mind that I never said I was good at this. I just like dabbling :)

It’s morning again and I see you walking out of your room, hair tussled, eyes still half-closed, a hint of a mustache shadowing the contours of your mouth. Your soft pink lips form the shape of a mumbled greeting, as you notice me sitting at the table and you drag your feet to occupy the seat across from me. I watch you rest your chin in the palms on your hands, as your elbows rest on the tabletop and patiently wait for you to shed away the last traces of sleep.

Reflexively, I stand from my chair to get you a cup of coffee, to help speed up the process. But as my fingers ghost over the ceramic material of your mug, I hesitate. I don’t really want you to be fully awake just yet. I turn around, leaning against the counter and simply look at you. There is nothing in this world that I would rather be doing, at this very moment, than this.  
  
As another thought crosses my mind, I push away from the counter and walk towards you, my feet carrying me to a distance no more than a breath away. As I look down at your gentle features, I find myself battling an almost unbearable urge to confess how much I love you. It would be the easiest way to tell you. However, you aren't known to be appreciative of simple things. You prefer complexity, so let me say it like this.  
  
My life began the day I met you. Far too young to contemplate on the complexity of the future that was starting to unravel before us, I treated you like a most beloved treasure. The roots of the bond that was formed, that day, grew deeper than either of us expected or could imagine. The trust that emerged, the intimacy, the shared passions, the memories, the tears, the pain, each one a new layer of the foundation upon which we build a friendship that would, most certainly, stand the test of time and space.  
  
We became relentless students of life and set our sales for achievements that seemed impossible to reach but far too tempting to ignore. We battled the world around us when it tried to bring us down, we hardened ourselves when we were faced with the doubts of others, we pushed ourselves when we felt like we were slowing down and all of this we did together. Regardless of what came our way, as long as we had each other, we always prevailed. So, is it too much of a stretch, too unbelievable, to think that the thread that connects us would turn out to be made of spider web, linking every single part of who I am to you?

Along our path my feet led me to strangers that held mere hints of who you are, small pieces that bared so much meaning to me, they drew me in. But none of them were you and with each attempt I became more painfully aware that what I was looking for was right beside me. Yet, my fears never allowed me to tell you how much I longed for you gaze upon me, how much I wished to have your undivided attention. I wanted to be the center of your world, the one to make you smile, the cause of your laughter, the recipient of your touches. I would give anything even for a momentary glimpse of your thoughts, in the hopes of finding a reflection of my own feelings hidden among them, to fuel the last remaining vestiges of something that seems to have been long lost to me. My courage.

If I had it, if I could find it, then perhaps I would be confessing right now how much I wish for you to be mine, how clear the image of a future, a lifetime, spent with you by my side, is inside my head. How desperate I am to know I am the only one you ever say ‘I love you’ to. I crave to be the one you share your happiness with, the one you always trust to lean on in your worst days, the one you can’t wait to do nothing with and just waste the day away. I want to kiss you until we are both out of breath, to ravish you in ways I can’t even put into words, to have you melting in my hands whispering my name as you come undone.

But standing here, looking at you smiling back at me with fondness written on your beautiful face and in those enchanting eyes, I keep asking myself if I will ever be strong enough to tell you how tempted I am, each night, to sneak into your room. How I dream of you sleeping right beside me only to wake up and be shattered by the cold and heatless truth of your absence. How I crave the warmth of your body as I try to tame my thoughts and feelings that won’t let me rest. How much I wish you wouldn’t want to go back to that damned room of yours each night.

The answer, as always, is no. I am a coward because I fear losing you above anything and everything else. So, if I am to bare this burden alone, I will gladly do so, as long as I am allowed to be part of your life. Even if you are the first thought that I wake up to and the last one as I fall asleep, the air that I breathe, my motivation to keep moving forward, the meaning to my life, the answer will not change.

With a heavy sigh of resignation, I turn around and head for the coffee maker once more. I grab your mug from the cupboard and fill it up to the brim, the dark liquid reflecting my pained expression. I do not wish for you to see it so, I school my features with, what I hope to be, a carefree smile. As I walk the few steps back to your seat my hand starts to tremble and I tense up to make it stop. I hope you did not notice that I was not very successful as I place the mug in front of you and straighten my back.

I probably look confused as I watch you stand from your seat, mug momentarily forgotten, place your hands on my checks and, raising on your tiptoes, plant a soft kiss on my lips. Then you turn around, grab your mug and waltz back to your room. I am frozen in place, staring at the wall in front on me, my brain refusing to comprehend or acknowledge your gesture. Then I hear you humming a familiar song, the sound of your voice breaking through the haze in my mind and I turn my head to look at your door.

“Brett, did I just…?” I start asking, feeling a chill of terror going down my spine.

I don’t get to finish my question though, because you come out of your room a cheeky smile stretching your lips and lean against the door frame “You’re gonna have to buy me dinner first, love. It’s only appropriate.” you throw my way, then just walk right back in.

“Fuck!” I whisper to myself, eyes still glued to where you were just a moment before. But as my knees are slightly shaking from the shock and the fear that had gone through me just a moment before, I grin like the idiot that I am.

**Author's Note:**

> <3 Thank you for reading! <3


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